Got the Car

Today, after much searching, I picked up our 1999 Toyota Land Cruiser from an Afrikaans guy in Paarl. This pushes us over the point of no return – we are irrevocably committed to the madness now.

I settled on a Land Cruiser after doing a lot of research on potential vehicles. All the “overlanders”, as they call themselves, seem embroiled in a debate over whether a Land Rover Defender or a Toyota Land Cruiser is the ideal vehicle to take across Africa – no other vehicles even feature. You’re either a Defender guy, a Land Cruiser guy or not a real guy at all, if you know what I mean.

So what makes the ideal vehicle in the view of the overlanders? Simplicity: no electronics, computers or complicated modern stuff that can’t be fixed with a piece of duct tape or a coat hanger – something that you can find tires for, and that if the duct tape and coat hanger don’t suffice, you can find parts for in deepest, darkest Africa.

So those criteria pretty much immediately excluded anything manufactured after 2000, and once I took a drive in a Defender, imagining my 3 kids bouncing off the roof for 30 solid days of driving, the Land Cruiser was without a doubt the way to go. It doesn’t have the African bush-whacking panache of a Land Rover Defender but my sore ass and fused spine wouldn’t give a damn about panache after a few hours being pulverized by a Defender. And I did my research: there are Toyota dealers liberally scattered from the Cape to Cairo – with only a few Land Rover dealers in Kenya….

I spent two weeks just trying to find a Land Cruiser for sale anywhere in South Africa – such is their status. I eventually found one and jumped on it before the guy had a chance even to advertise it. For an 11 year-old SUV with 285,000 kms on the clock I paid about the same as for a fully-loaded new Mercedes E-Class in Canada. Sheesh. This thing better be bloody good.

I test drove it and took it to the mechanics to be checked out. No worries, the mechanic said with tones of deep respect in his voice, this thing will do 1,000,000 kms. It does 0-60mph in about 30 minutes, downhill – no turbo diesel in this thing but its 4.2 litre diesel engine could pull a hippo out of quick sand. It drives like a slightly refined tractor and doesn’t have a mere carbon footprint, more a carbon meteor strike. It has centre, front and rear differential locks (anyone know what these are for?), full-time 4 wheel drive, Hi & Lo 4×4 gearing and a fuel gauge that handily outpaces the odometer. The only vaguely electronic gizmo (excluding the radio and that annoying Toyota/Lexus digital clock) is the ABS brake system. Be gone metrosexual tendencies. Be gone stir-frying, nappy-changing, BMW station wagon driving Mr. Mom. I can ignore our impact on global warming for a bit. I kinda like this ponderous, diesel-guzzling beast.

The clincher, aside from the massive torrents of testosterone it inspired, was that it already has some of the bits I’d need to install such as a dual-battery system, dual long-range fuel tanks, 2 spare tires, pre-wired fridge electrics and lots of really big wheels.